Shaun Lewis: the Man, the Myth, the Legend

Well, in case anyone cares there is approximately 14 inches of snow surrounding my house right now. That’s just an estimate—there very well could be a lot more. Needless to say, the first snow of the season came today with quite a fury. I feel sorry for Jacki because she works at the United States Post Office about 30 minutes away; she has to go to work even with the amount of snow that came down. After all, rain, sleet or snow will not stop the United States Post Office. I think she deserves props for that.

On a totally unrelated topic (and I mean TOTALLY unrelated), there is a car on fire just around the corner from my house. In fact, I believe it is Al’s Monte Carlo (he is a friend of Jason’s and an acquaintance of mine). Interestingly enough, it was actually kind of a coincidence that I even noticed the fire. Dexter (the cat) wanted to go outside, so I opened the front door for him. He wouldn’t go out, but I held the door open anyway and gazed outside; it looked very peaceful with the snow and everything. I heard some people laughing and was somewhat surprised because it was 1:30 in the morning, but I didn’t see anybody and as such, didn’t pay much attention. Eventually, after about a minute, I got cold and closed the door.

A few minutes later, Dexter wanted to “go outside” (sit in front of the door and not move because it’s cold) again, so I opened the door and held it open for a second time. Right about then, I heard what sounded like a bloody shotgun go off. I looked around and saw an orange light dancing back and forth against the front of some houses.

There was a fire!

From what Jason told me while we were watching the Best Buy van fire, I figured it was a car and the sound I heard was one of the tires exploding (thanks, Jason). So, I grabbed a coat, my shoes and my cell phone and ran out the door to make sure no one was hurt or anything. I called 9-1-1 and after I saw it was just a car, went back inside to watch the free entertainment unfold from within the confines of my warm abode. In fact, that’s where I am now. I wonder why all these cars keep catching fire around me. It’s probably because I’m so hot, things just spontaneously combust anytime I’m near them.

Please, don’t laugh.